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Saturday 14 May 2016

The good things in life...

"When you finally get something good, enjoy it. 
Don't always go looking for something better."

I saw this quote on facebook today and it really struck a chord with me. Many years ago when my eldest, who is now 13, was very tiny. I used to read a cute little book to her. It was about a mouse family who took walks along the sand, swam in the rivers, lived in the country with fields and trees where they made rope swings and went for jogs... you get my drift. When I read it to my little girl, who was then a toddler, I would tell her that one day we'll get to live by the sea and have walks along the sand, be able to climb trees and swim wildly in the sea or rivers. 

A couple of years later, when my daughter was 3 and my, then youngest, was 8mths old, we moved to live near the sea. Unfortunately I had long term postnatal depression that lasted from when my son was born until he was 2 1/2 yrs old so, despite it being exactly what I had wanted for years, it wasn't something that I appreciated fully for a long time.

A lot has changed over the past 10 years that we've been living here. We've had good times and bad times, the last year being one of the worst we've ever had for varying reasons... but all of that has led to something amazing happening. I have felt this on and off for the past few years now, but not as much as I feel it now. I am so so happy in my life right now. So grateful for what I have. I'm approaching 40 and I guess it's a time in my life that I can look at it and see what I've done. I have achieved SO much. Maybe not in the same way that someone else might view achievement. But for me it is all I ever wanted. 

I live in that house by the sea. We have a woodland running along the back of our garden so our view from our decking and our bedroom window is nothing but green trees and an abundance of birds and wildlife. 


We have been lucky enough for a colony of bees to set up a temporary home in our garden 3 years running and a permanent home once. We don't have a lot of flowers in our garden, but we do have lots of green hedges, and I guess that's just something they must like.





 We go for walks along the sand, swim in the sea, the children climb trees and play in the woods. 



We are lucky enough to have made some wonderful friends since we have lived here and my parents and sister also live within walking distance to our house.

I haven't made a huge career for myself but I do what I love. I write. I create. And I surround myself with my beautiful beautiful children. Home educating 2 of them is amazing. In July I will have all 3 of them here with me learning and enjoying life together. We have great plans for the future and we are so excited for what we hope to achieve. Our home, however busy and hectic it gets, is where all our hearts lie. I love my home and have big plans on how to make the spaces within it work better for when we are all here (watch this space).

I was always the one who was "looking for something better". There was always something that I was searching for to make my life complete. But this is it. This is what I dreamed of when I was a child. This is my life. C x

Monday 2 May 2016

The end of a perfect day...

We have all had the most lovely afternoon today. We met up with some lovely friends of ours who we haven't seen for some time. The children had grown up together and to be honest I was a little worried how they would be together seeing as it had been so long without contact and definitely for T, life has changed quite dramatically since the last time she saw them. But I needn't have worried. They slotted back into their close friendships as if they'd never been apart. We had a gorgeous (if breezy) stroll along the beach, stopped for coffee and snacks at the park cafe and then wandered back to our car. We had lots to catch up on and I feel, as I often do, that we never had enough time to be together to really catch up with all the news.

However, having decided we will have a weekend away together in a couple of month's time we now have something fabulous to look forward to and a much longer catch up to be had.

I am very lucky to have a selection of very close friends. I'm not one to have a big circle of friends, but the ones I have are extremely dear to me. I guess, again, that's perfectionism. Just any old "friends" won't do. They have to be perfect ones. And I think the ones I have are pretty close to that, and for that I am hugely thankful. xx

Put on those dancing shoes!

I am so incredibly proud of my two boys right now. My middle child, C, who is 11, has recently started drama classes at school. He's been chosen for a speaking part at the end of school performance and has been praised for his acting skills by his drama teacher at school. He's such a shy quiet boy normally at school that this is such a massive achievement for him. So much so, he's wanting to start outside drama classes at a "proper" stage school - of which he will be starting after our holiday in May.

My youngest child, F, who is 4, has recently started a dance class. His teacher, after only the first lesson said how fabulous he was at listening and she could really see him exercise his problem solving skills to figure out how to do various moves.

After a few weeks, the teacher announced that she wasn't going to keep going with the parent and child dance classes on a Thursday and that we could either go to the Tuesday class or they could start the "big" class for 4-11yr olds doing musical theatre and possible street dance afterwards. After speaking to her, she said that she though F was more than ready to take on musical theatre and so he started the class last week. This is an extract from the diary I jotted down while I waited for him:

This is my first experience of leaving my little boy and I'm so glad he won't be going to school in September.

He's currently having his first musical theatre class with an age range of 4-11 year olds so being just 4 (2 wks ago) he's by far the youngest. Thankfully we started parent and toddler dance classes in the same place a few weeks ago so he was a bit aware of what he was getting into, but he still looked far too tiny and shy when I left him there.
It's only half an hour and I'm in the foyer, a mere 20 seconds walk away from the room he's in. It's the tiniest theatre... but it's his very first glimpse of independence.

My tiny baby boy is growing up so fast and I'm so so incredibly proud of who is becoming.

I needn't have worried. He absolutely loved it and announced that next week he will stay for the second half an hour too so he can do street dance after musical theatre.

My grown up boy in his grown up world. Love him to pieces.